Saturday, March 21, 2009

Driver's Dit



D-Day.


The big day arrived and flew by like a cyclist in the heat of the desert. A wake up call by Captain Cooper was immediately followed by a brisk breakfast and a short trip down to the starting line, Oceanside Pier.

Sat Nav it turns out isn't that great if you haven't also got a map.....typing in 'the pier' doesn't work basically!!! Anyway, after some initial hiccups the morning logistics started to smooth out and I personally was privy to one of the best deception tactics ever!

Captain Cooper attempt to use a roadside dunny was turned down outright by the mexican fruit and veg farmer in the middle of nowhere. After a brief team talk Able Seaman Stone decided to purchase some fresh oranges from the aforementioned shopkeeper. With Midshipman Jones on lookout duties, and Stoney in deep negotiation/haggling duties with our Mexican friend - Captain Cooper sidestepped his way into the dunny and gladly relieved himself - a job done! (The oranges were nice too).

Able Seaman Stone also gave us a sneak peak of his 'milkshake', acompanied by bellowing lift music - a treat and strong sign of entertainment to come over the next week.

As mentioned below, the 15 mile descent to Palm Springs was a cyclists' dream, however, the smell of burning brakes and their distinct lack of function after only 3 of those miles was a slight concern! However, after a brief stop at a vista, all was well and all involved breathed a sigh of relief.

Looking forward to the next few days and hopefully some straighter roads. Trying to steer a 25 ft camper down narrow mountain roads could be compared to doing the olympic bobsleigh run in a bouncy castle! Stoney, after a few too many hellraising miles, finally jumped ship and christened the Virgin bike with a 20 miler into 29 Palms - only to then jump fully clothed in the pool with the Bear and Pork Pie at the wrong hotel!

The day ended as all days end for olympic athletes....beer and pizza at Pizza Hut in high quantities.

Tomorrow is a new day, a new challenge and new destination. Pilot and Co-pilot will keep you all posted.

Over and out.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Drivers Dit

So day one came and off they went, all hero’s one and all, but it wasn’t long before old Merv he had to take a fall, he ate too much at Breakfast time and now feels such a twit, so made the driver Ian Stone pull over for a shit!

But as he wondered through a field and looking through a hedge he came open a Mexican man holding his fruit and veg, away he cried don’t think that you can treat me like a twit, Then Merv replied elgringo all i want to do is shit.

Relief it brought a smile to Merv a grin form ear to ear and then Stoney jumped out on his bike and the grin turned into fear,
I have to my bit he said and ride past fields and farms to take my aches and growing piles down hill to 29 Palms.

So twenty two miles later and sunburn on his head, he really thought his time had come and he would end up dead, for fully clothed and desperate into a pool he fell to find out by a angered man it was the wrong Hotel :)

There is a moral to this ode, as yet it’s hard to find,
The backroom staff of coast2coast are intelligent and kind.
The smiles and tears along the way will all be plain to see
And there will be no hiding the fact cause it’s on the BBC


Keep it up! Onwards and upwards.